


Soothing Presence

by LostOpium



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anxiety, Autism, Fluff, M/M, gallibert, kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:54:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27561064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LostOpium/pseuds/LostOpium
Summary: Porco is waiting for an important letter and has trouble managing his anxiety. But, luckily for him, Bertholdt is here to help him relax.
Relationships: Porco Galliard/Bertolt Hoover
Comments: 6
Kudos: 23





	Soothing Presence

**Author's Note:**

> My first Gallibert fanfiction! Or PeanutButter as I like to call it. I rarely write but, when I told this idea (one of so many) to Whiteasy, a dear friend of mine, she encouraged me to try to turn it into an actual fic. And I did. And I thank her for that and her good advices <3  
> So, of course, I dedicate this fic to all my little chouquettes who love PeanutButter <3 But if you enjoyed this fic, please, don't forget to thank Whiteasy too! Without her, I wouldn't have tried. Check her work too if you don't know it already, cause she's an excellent writer and I learnt a lot from her. <3  
> You can also thank Tycho Azrephet who fixed my terrible frenglish and grammar mistakes!!! Thank you, love. <3  
>   
> 

For the tenth time this evening, Porco dove his hand in the pocket of his jeans to pull out his phone with a quiet grunt. His thumb slid on the partly cracked screen, searching his messages, and for the tenth time this evening, he found himself disappointed. He stared a moment at the lack of new text before impatiently refreshing the phone application. But the result remained the same. He then quickly checked his voicemails in case he had missed a call but... No. Nothing. Neither from his brother nor even his parents. How come he still hadn't received anything yet? 

  
With a frustrated sigh, Porco dropped his phone next to him on the sofa and turned his attention back to the movie he was watching with Bertholdt. His boyfriend gave him a worried look that Porco tried to avoid by keeping his eyes locked on the TV. He muttered a deceitful “I’m fine” to reassure him but he felt his guts clenching at such a pitiful lie. He didn’t even know why he’d hide the truth from his brunet. He had lost count of all the times Bertholdt had reassured him that it was normal to be so stressed over such a matter, that there was nothing to be ashamed of. After all, Porco was attempting to get into the prestigious university of Harvard.

  
Of course, he knew that if he was rejected, he could take over his father’s business as a chef in their family’s restaurant. It would be a comfortable position that he wouldn’t refuse, but Harvard was his dream since middle school. He had worked so hard for it, maybe too hard even. If someone pointed it out, he’d always answer with a confident grin that it would be worth it. 

  
But what if he didn’t get in? What if his immaculate grades weren't enough? What if all the inhuman efforts he gave during all these years were for nothing? Yes, he would have a job, a place in society. Though, it would be hard for him not to feel deeply disappointed in himself. To feel like a failure. To BE a failure. 

  
Porco had been stressing over Harvard’s answer for days now. His fingernails were all chewed short, he wore massive dark circles from the lack of restful sleep and even lost a little bit of weight. His family and friends had started worrying about him. But the young man’s anxiety caused him to be more irritable than normal, and nobody dared expressing their concerns for fear of angering him. One would be a fool to even want to face an angry Porco. The only person who could soothe his nerves was his darling Bertholdt. The delicate nature and kindness of the gentle giant always effortlessly appeased him. 

  
That’s why he had accepted Bertholdt’s invitation to come over to his place. And also, because Marcel promised to keep an eye out for any letter addressed to his name and text him right away. He was supposed to relax, to spend some quality time with his boyfriend. But he couldn’t keep his mind away from the long-awaited letter as well as the dreadful possibility of being rejected. The suspense was unbearable, tortuous even! And it showed. 

  
Porco’s left leg was relentlessly shaking, punctuated by his now overwhelming anxiety. It was only when he felt the large but thin hand of Bertholdt gently resting on his leg that he realized what he had been mindlessly doing. His tremors then gradually slowed down as he took notice of them but he was unable to stop completely. Again, Porco felt guilty. He knew about Bertholdt’s sensitivity; he knew about it since they were children. The sounds of his jeans’ fabric against the couch, plus the repetitive and rough motion of his leg, must have bothered his senses. 

  
Porco was about to apologize when he felt the warm fingers softly squeezing his thigh. The reassuring gesture drew his attention to Bertholdt who was fumbling in his pocket with his free hand. The strawberry-blond haired man raised an inquisitive eyebrow as he watched his lover pulling out a cubic object with a triumphant smile stretching on his face. A fidget cube. Bertholdt carefully placed the gadget into the slightly more padded palm of Porco. 

  
“Please, take mine.” Bertholdt said with an encouraging and soft voice. 

  
Porco looked at the fidget cube then at the brunet again. He had seen Bertholdt playing with that thing before. He’d pull it out and fidget with it when he was feeling anxious or simply nervous. It wasn’t much of a toy for him, more like a tool to help him have some control over himself. He couldn’t take it from him! Porco opened his mouth, ready to retort but the brunet didn’t let him say a word.   
  
  
“You need it more than me right now. Don’t worry, I’ll be fine, I’m with you, nothing can happen to me.” 

  
Porco couldn’t look away from Bertholdt’s soft and reassuring smile as he replayed his words in his mind. And when he finally looked up, he was met with beautiful half-lidded grey eyes glimmering with love for him. Just for him. He suddenly felt a warm wave overflowing his core and almost immediately, the tremors in his leg vanished under the gentle touch of his boyfriend. How could he refuse him? 

  
“Tsss... You know me too well, babe.” Porco muttered playfully, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Come here.” 

  
The soft blush appearing on Bertholdt’s tanned cheeks as he was slowly approaching made Porco chuckle proudly. He leaned forward himself, craning his neck towards the brunet until they were close enough for their lips to timidly brush against each other. Porco loved to relish in the pleasant sensation of Bertholdt’s soft and warm lips on his as their kiss gently deepened. A way for him to immerse himself into the sweet kindness he craved for. Then they parted so the brunet could press an encouraging kiss on the strawberry-blond haired forehead and get back to his initial posture to watch the movie that was still going on. 

  
Porco tried to ignore the heat tingling on his cheeks as he repositioned himself to focus again on the movie. The fidget cube now in his right hand, he started playing with it almost by rote. His mind was still wandering as he manipulated the gadget but somehow, his thoughts were flowing more freely. Porco could finally focus more easily on the movie... Or on Bertholdt’s thumb gently caressing the side of his leg since his hand was still resting on it. A reassuring touch that was somehow saying more than any words. It was an “ _I love you, Porco._ ” and a “ _Don’t worry, I’m with you._ ”. 

  
But it was also a “ _No matter what happens, you’re no failure in my eyes and I’ll support you, whatever you’ll face._ ”. Porco felt his heart clenching a bit at this thought but there was no way he could express all of his feelings to his darling Bertholdt. He had never been good at expressing his feelings even to him. But, God, he loved him so much. 

  
Without taking his eyes off the TV, Porco ever so softly slid his free hand onto Bertholdt’s. Slowly, carefully, his fingers traveled over the tanned skin, reading every shape caused by the tendons, bones and scars. Once is palm was over the other one, he squeezed the hand gently before caressing the back of it with his thumb. A way for him to tell his boyfriend— 

_  
Thank you, I love you too._


End file.
